Our Little Theo… Our Big Sebastian…

At 5.26pm on the 29th of September, our world changed… Our family grew by one teeny tiny little person and our whole world tipped upside down.

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It has been a busy few weeks in our house, what with the constant stream of visitors seeking new born baby cuddles, half of whom haven’t graced us with a visit in 19 months since Sebastian was born and figuring out how to juggle a boisterous toddler and a newborn.

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I had been so scared throughout my pregnancy that I couldn’t possibly love another as much as I did Sebastian, and I don’t think I really bonded with him during my pregnancy, and a lot of the time my bump felt like more of an inconvenience than something wonderful. It made me frightened that when the baby came along, I wouldn’t love him. I couldn’t have been more wrong.

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The moment Theo was placed on my chest, seconds after his birth, my heart exploded, all my worries subsided and I knew I loved him, just as much as I did his brother, he gave me a feeling of completeness, his arrival filled a space in our family I didn’t know we had.

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Sebastian visited us in the delivery suite, bringing with him a single flower, he sat on the bed and met his new baby brother for the very first time, and I led there holding my boys, one in each arm, the emotion of the last hours washing over me, two arms, two hands, one to hold a hand of each of them.

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Since his birth he has slotted into our family perfectly, he is a brilliant sleeper, often going four hours between each feed; this is giving me precious time to devote to Sebastian as my darling boy has found the change somewhat difficult. He is struggling, fighting a cold and teething, so the last two weeks have been filled with nightmares and tears and clingy cuddles. He is brilliant with Theo, always wanting to give him cuddles and kisses, being wonderfully gentle and bringing him toys and sharing his Bear-Bears, although chucking his toy cars into the Moses basket isn’t the safest, I know the sentiment is there.

As our family grew in size by one, my heart doubled.

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